Embodying the Goddess

Hathor, most beloved

So many revelations and new beginnings have transpired over the past few months. I started learning Reiki and Channeling; both seem to compliment each other in very powerful ways.  I felt the call to be a Healer among so many other things, but to learn the art of spiritual healing is to be the foundation for my journey into a brand new dimension of reality.

I keep being told that I’ve repeated these acts of initiation a thousand times before, but I remember feeling like I was sitting on pins and needles just waiting for my first lesson to start like the newbie student I am this lifetime around. I knew these classes would blast me open even more than I already was and I couldn’t wait to get started. I actually started willing time to speed up.  In the interim I would distract myself with my newfound sensate abilities as well as intuitive flashes like a game in order to “hone my skills.”  Of course, I had no idea what I was doing, running purely on instinct, so most of what I saw or felt was basically by universal design.  The new ultraviolet light vision is pretty darn cool though. Thanks Universe. 😉

The day my first Channeling class started I was late and trying very hard not to scold myself for losing track of time…, again (a common occurrence now).  Needless to say, my mindset at the end of the three-day intensive was shot and I was questioning my own sanity to boot. I had no idea what I was doing there. And just as they said at the beginning of class, I would feel exactly like I was making everything up by the end, but that I needed to trust that everything I experienced was real and true.

At the time, the only thing I did know was when an Absolute Truth was being spoken; which I’ve learned I can actually feel.   This new gift came to me when I acknowledged my I AM presence.  I didn’t even realize it was a thing until another person, who is gifted with infusing different energies into objects, handed me a scarf out of the blue and told me it was made for me.  As he handed me the scarf I could feel an amazing amount of energy held within the scarf but I didn’t realize its full potential until I wrapped it about my neck.  Immediately it felt like a warm and tingly cloak of protection had wrapped itself around my BEing.  He told me the scarf was infused with the protection and essence of the I AM presence, and when he saw me he knew it was made for me.  Holding and honoring such a gift, I could feel the resonance vibrating within and without me, filling me with Knowing. So I felt the absolute truth in the class Instructor’s words as she spoke them aloud, and I endeavored to believe everything that took place that weekend and my belief endured.

I had a month to wait and process all that I learned until the next level class would be administered so I took advantage of the alone time and meditated on everything I experienced. Asking for clarity where it was needed and giving thanks when the answers were easily received.

Patroness of dancers and lover of the arts

My eyes are constantly burning now, which is a side-effect to Channeling. When Spirit uses your eyes the amount of energy they utilize through them significantly burns so washing them or using Saline is the only way to dilute the intensity until you’re either used to it or ask Spirit to not use your eyes so much. Unfortunately, I still have this tendency to be of a more masculine mindset and I always think if I just keep going and move past the pain I’ll get used to it and will never need ask for Spirit to let up. As a matter of fact I always have this inane desire to ask for more to my own stubborn detriment later , and then I’m reminded by Spirit to take a nice salt and baking soda bath which seriously minimizes the pain of all spiritually growing ailments.

I am finally learning to slow my roll or else Spirit basically forces me to, which is embarrassing and yet another lesson in itself.  Diving head first has been the name of the game ever since my final “wake up call” back in May. Once I had a taste of it and fully understood what “it” was, my thirst for more connection, absolute truth, and understanding was never quenched.  And so at my own urging I’m being “fast-tracked” towards Enlightenment. I end up learning lessons fast and hard and feeling the burn oh-so-acutely, literally.

I gained a rash all over the core of my body that just utterly destroyed me. I wanted to rip my skin off because it itched and burned so bad. I didn’t go to the doctors because I knew what was happening and had faith that once my body acclimated to the changes I was making on a cellular level then all would be well.  It took two months though…TWO MONTHS…  AA Raphael was on speed dial every night when the rash would flare up.  Sometimes I could have sworn he was shaking his head at me… ya know, like how a father does when his child had to learn the hard way instead of listening. Oi…that AA sure does have a sense of humor though. I don’t think I could have handled it as well as I did without him there laughing with me. I guess he knew I needed it. Humor has always helped me through the darkest of times.

So on top of your normal, run-of-the-mill, everyday ascension symptoms, living a life of bleeding and raw pain was me for 8 weeks. I’ll spare you the grisly details but life was not fun; which fueled my need to learn how to heal ten-fold, if only to heal myself faster than what Spirit was allowing. Of course, I’m well aware of the lesson here and still haven’t slowed down.  And you know what?  My new Guide is starting to send me messages of “I’m even stronger than I think.” So there’s that. 😀

Who is this mysterious new Spirit Guide that kept me in a daze for days? Her name is Sekhmet and if you’re current on your Ancient Egyptian Mythology (or even if you’re not, she’s pretty dang old) she is one of the oldest of Goddesses. Being a rare female Solar deity (Sun Gods are almost always male) with the power of a male deity, she is The Powerful One and the Goddess of Destruction and Healing; the epitome of the Divine Masculine/Feminine Balancing Act since her other half is the joyful, loving, and sensual Hathor.

I’m learning that channeling both Sekhmet and Hathor gives an ever clearer and stronger connection with Source as well as coming to embody more attributes than just sheer power and strength. I find my joy and need for tuning into my own sensuality has increased dramatically. I’m serious. I find myself looking at attractive men and women like something I wish to stalk and pounce upon for “playtime.” The sexual energy is so heady I’m nearly about to jump someone before I pull myself back and mentally check myself to reign in the hormones!

Sekhmet in a blind rage

Aside from the dramatic increase in my sexual desire and confidence, I resonate very well with the rest of her Essence. She reminds me so much of myself in the fact that I’ve led a very destructive life during the predominantly masculine and egocentric part of my young-adult era and now that I’ve grown comfortable with my gentle, feminine side I feel more balanced; able to soothe the beast within me instead of relinquishing my hold and raging blindly like Sekhmet did when the Sun God Ra loosed her on humanity so many eons ago.  Having to trick her with blood colored beer and intoxicate her in order to bring her back to her peaceful and fun-loving, Hathor-self.

Sekhmet/Hathor revealed herself to me during my third Reiki attunement two weeks before my Intermediate Channeling class. My first day of Reiki training went really well, but I still felt like I didn’t know what I was doing so on the second day She came to me and lovingly asked me to trust myself. She was so gentle and her eyes were full of so much love and fierce confidence. She kept repeating herself to me as if she needed to because I still wasn’t trusting myself.  She then told me she loved me and that all I need do is have faith in myself and the Universe because I’m exactly where I’m suppose to be.

I held her words close to my heart during my second practice Reiki run and I could feel her within me, guiding and loving me. She guided my thoughts and helped the energy to pull through me from the ether and into my practice client.  She came so far forward at one point my Reiki instructor even said she saw her. She said my face changed every time I went deep into meditation and she could see the face of a fierce female warrior superimposed over mine.  I hadn’t told her I had seen Sekhmet/Hathor earlier so the fact that she basically described her the same way I saw her felt validating to say the least.  And I also got really good feedback from my practice client stating that our session felt like a fully-trained Reiki practitioner had worked on him. Yay!

She didn’t reveal her name to me then so I didn’t know who she was until my Channeling class.  The great thing was my Channeling instructor already knew I had switched guides again. I was in mid-switch from AA Raphael to Mother Mary during my beginner’s class a month before. Usually Channelers have their main Channel (like my instructor’s main Channel is AA Metatron, he’s been with her for many years) and a few have multiple Channels they switch back and forth between, but it’s few and far between to find a Channeler that tends to bounce from Channel to Channel like I seem to be doing.  But I’m starting to get the feeling that it’s a common occurrence for beginner Channelers still feeling things out.

I thought at first I just didn’t know what I was doing and I was just calling out the first Spirit I could think of, but I’ve learned Bouncers bounce because each spirit has something specific to teach us at that time. Some of them stay with us forever, but most just have a guest appearance until we learn the lesson they contracted with us to learn.  And since I’m asking to be fast-tracked this situation makes sense to me.  Although, I’m really loving the feel of Sekhmet/Hathor’s energy and I hope she’s one of the spirits that stays with me forever…

And that’s another thing I’m learning, each spirit has their own energy signature.  I’ve been told each soul does too, but I have yet to run into a human or animal that registers on my scales the way Spirit does.  My talent tends to lay in sensing the energy around me and “having a feel” of each type of energy. Like harsh, volatile, or negative energy feels very jagged and sharp to me. It feels like I’m being pricked with needles on my skin. Not a very fun feeling; although, the feeling of natural harsh energy like an electrical storm or the build up of a strong warm-front about to dump loads of windy rain just feels heavy and I tend to get a metallic taste in the back of my throat depending on how strong the storm, and it doesn’t feel uncomfortable at all.  Only the energy I’ve felt from other humans have been able to make me feel sick, uncomfortable, or in down-right pain, which in a sense makes… well, sense.

Sekhmet/Hathor’s energy feels like love made into liquid silk, poured into

The sensual lover

warm honey, and fed to a kitten that then purrs non-stop while it rubs itself against me in a very possessive and sensual way.  Yes, I know… a lot more detailed than one expects, but that is EXACTLY how she feels to me and I LOVE Her.  I can’t get enough of her and I have a very hard time letting her go when I go into Channel.  I’ve never felt that way with AA Raphael or Mother Mary so I wonder on the reasons why.  I hope it’s because she’s my Forever Spirit Guide. I would absolutely transcend into the next life completely fulfilled and happy if it turns true!

The revealing part of my channeling was when I realized I was able to go on shamanic-like journeys while channeling, read oracle cards for others or other people for that matter, and see past lives. These were all exercises our Instructor led us on and it was truly amazing.  I had no idea Channeling was so inclusive/interchangeable with the other types of tools for gaining esoteric knowledge.  I’m really excited about fully enhancing my abilities here so I can learn as much as I can and help others in as many ways as possible.  I can’t wait for Advanced training to start next year. That will be another four months of intensive training…yay!

Take care, and Be Love!


(Images courtesy of the Journey Goddess blog found here)


5 thoughts on “Embodying the Goddess

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  1. I’m so glad you wrote this post because despite how often we catch up in person, I’ve never truly felt like I had a good grasp on how the overall process of your classes have felt like for you! But I feel like I do now! Yay! All of the goddess pictures you found are freaking beautiful. *o* (<— that's a face, in case you couldn't tell, lol.) Wish I knew who mine was! Being with you on this journey is such a blessing and an amazing experience. ❤ Love you!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yay! So true but only because I know I’m way better at expressing myself in writing than I am through speaking. I’m getting better though! I think my excitement gets the best of me sometimes and I leave key details out. ;p

      And we can work together on finding out who your Spirit guide is but I have a feeling you already know and are really just looking for validation. We’ll work on that too! 😉

      I LOVE you too! ❤


  2. Wow what an fast awakening you are having. I too LOVE mother Skhmet. She gave an attunment on a recent spiritual retreat. Her energy was incredible. How wonderful that you are channeling. I have only been able to channel AAM, but in my case it isn’t quite channeling becuase I am an aspect of AAM. I guess I am channeling my higher self. Love your posts and reading about your growth. I was literally adding the picture for my Goddess poem I just posted and your goddess post popped up. SYNCHRONICITY! The Goddess energy is here for sure!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I saw that synchronicity too!!! I had just posted my post when i saw a notification for your post and how we were both posting about the Goddess! Incredible! I love it! I wanted to respond right away but alas I had to drive. Lol. I love reading your blog too. Your messages are always so helpful and exactly when I need them. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

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